I've officially maxed out my bookshelf. The one I got in 4th grade, that I swore I'd never be able to fill.
And in an attempt to clear some space, I attempted a second round of cleaning it out, to donate books I no longer have a use for.
But unlike last time I couldn't get rid of any of them.
At this point, I've got the following shelf organization:
-religion books/Bibles/hymnals....obviously not going anywhere.
-my row o' classics/ books I really want to read at some point- Tolkien, Lewis, and various
-books from high school
-misc- yearbooks, old textbooks that'll be helpful, etc...also staying put.
So, theoretically, I could regain 1/4 of my shelf space if I'd be willing to knock out that 3rd row. Which I thought would be no problem...all the books I wanted to burn all thru high school, I could finally rid myself of.
But apparently it's not that easy. Even though I shuddered to look at the books on the far right (senior year English project books), and all but dropped a book when I recalled the memories of reading it, I couldn't get rid of them. I just can't. They're too much a part of me.
And maybe it has something to do with the fact that I wrote a lot in those books. A lot. And it'd not be too helpful to give them away. All my notes would make it impossible for someone to read.
But there's a part of me that wants to re-read them. Even Silas Marner. And The Old Man and the Sea. (blasphemy! I know!) Partly to re-read my notes. Partly to see what they're like without the pressures of school. Without the obligation of a project. Just to read them for fun.
And yet these books made my life miserable for 4 years...
Is this me just wanting to live in the past? Or just an excuse I'm making to keep some of my worldly goods? Do I just not want to erase the past? Or is there some part of me that just doesn't want to get rid of something I put so much of me into- even though it was too much?
Perhaps it's like my stuffed animals...I needed to be a few years detached from them before I could donate them....
1 comment:
Okay, Casey. I need you to sit down, put your head between your legs, and take deep breaths. When the world stops spinning and you can think clearly, take all those books and and burn the crap out of 'em!
Well, you don't have to burn them, I guess. But re-read them? Oh, the humanity!! (Erm, I guess it's a little ironic to be quoting Heart of Darkness while urging you to burn your English books.) Silas Freaking Marner? Casey Hersh, if you're lucky, you've got 80 years of life left, and there are a thousand billion million books to read. Don't take the time to re-read Silas Marner... it's just not worth it.
If you've got to reread an English book, go for A Separate Peace or something...
bleeegh. English books.
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